Sunday, May 30, 2010

彩虹和它所有的颜色!乐于

追逐彩虹,希望在它的终端可以寻找到聚宝盆, 如此浪漫,又是何等的诱人 ... 青春时代,我们满怀着希望和憧憬。我们所追求的是什么, 财富还是幸福? 当我们实现物质财富时我们幸福吗?也许....也许不。因此,如果我们追求幸福,假使它可实现的话,我们还需要物质财富吗?退一步想,幸福是什么?哪里是幸福之所在

我们必须记住,生命是一个旅程,幸福伴我们左右。有比这个选择更好的吗! 我们可以把幸福看作是经历真相时的一种交易。在交易当中,我们感知刺激,并且随之应对来定义有质量的经历(幸福), 或其他感觉。我们为什么往往感到人生仍然不完整?可能是因为我们缺乏质量的经历。也许是缺乏同理心,阻止了此类经历。

发起者担心开展讨论会对他们的利益产生负面影响 ,其结果是我们错过了合作机会。我们可以把它归类成一个协调的问题。当遭遇一个抛锚的协调时,良性的发展将无法继续,存在的问题继续溃烂, 产生风险可能导致无序的结果。通常情况, 是一种刺激作用 吸引了零和增益赢家的所得是建立在输家的付出上。是否可以有一个双赢的结果,其中的幸福可以共享?
人们是否可以遵照既定而无成文共识的规定坐下来蹉商。如果不存在是为什么呢?

又回到协调的问题...是什么决定我们选择行动的方针?往往我们使用价格来寻求供需平衡。我们认为可能依赖短期的观点来达到最好的结果 ... 即团体中的每个个体成员实现其自身利益最大化。然而,约翰纳什补充了一个条款“个体利益和团队利益最大化”。据他说,“如果我们都将目标锁定在最美的女孩(由于定义稀缺)...我们对彼此形成障碍。任何人也不可以得到她(目标)。此后我们再去找她的朋友,肯定被她们断然拒绝, 因为没人喜欢被视为第二选择。好了,假设我们越过最美的女孩分别选择她的朋友们呢?我们并不会相互妨碍,也不会侮辱到别人。这是唯一共赢的方法”。

以下问题可以帮助我们更明确是什么正将我们的幸福挡在门外。

a)当你没有实现你所要做的,你会感到不安吗?
b)你能坦然面对挫折,谋求新的出路吗?
c)为什么实现你的目标如此重要呢?

设定目标是过程驱动的,你要了解什么是您需要采取的步骤,以达到从头到尾。很多时候,我们作出迅速和毫无根据的假设,因此我们无法到达我们的目标。任何捷径没有可能性达到它,当您分析您的误步骤时候你才会体认什么是消极反应的刺激触发。

与人类的情感,亦是最具挑战性和困难的任务之一。有太多感人的发挥大量元器件,而为个人的利益是不完全对齐 结果是无法控制。同样,我们可以其中鉴定消极反应的触发的刺激。

因此,从根本上开始,我们需要鉴定共同的价值观与志同道合的人。那么,如何才能说服人,合作比竞争更好?

当谈到合作,我们需要采取大视力,而行动小步骤的方式。这有助于分解为简单元素的复杂问题。我们要巩固我们的一些假设效能和执行逻辑顺序的步骤。每一个成功的一步加强信任与信任是可以克服协调的问题

一旦合作者觉得舒适,相信合作会导致一个双赢的成果,最终的端到端过程, 创建它的生态系统的制衡的存在 - 我们就可以坐下来享受这个旅程,并幸福伴我们左右。


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Thursday, May 27, 2010

Rainbow And Colour of It All! Be Happy

Chasing rainbow and hoping to find a pot of gold at the end of it ...so romantic, so enticing...When we were more youthful and hopeful, we must have been memerised by such thoughts.

What is it that we are chasing? Riches or happiness. Will we be happy when we attain material wealth? Maybe .... perhaps not. So if we pursue happiness, if ever that is achievable, do we need material wealth? Taking a step back, we need to ask ourselves what is happiness? What does it mean to be happy?

We need to remember that life is a journey, and happiness our companion. What better option can we make? We can liken happiness to a transaction where we experience for a fleeting moment of ~ truth. In a transaction, we come into contact with a stimulus and how we response defines whether the experience is quality ( happiness ) or otherwise.


How is it that we feel more often than not that life remains unfulfilled? Could be that we lack quality experiences. Maybe it is the lack of empathy that prevents us from such experiences.

First movers fear it is against their interest to initiate a discussion and the end result is that we miss an opportunity to co-operate. This can be categorised as a co-ordination issue. When there is a break-down in co-ordination, there will be no meaningful progress, and any underlying issue will be allowed to fester and there would be risk of a disorderly outcome. The likely scenario is a stimulus that is likely to attract a zero-sum gain, a positive response at the expense of someone's negative response. Is it possible to have a win-win outcome, where happiness can be shared? Can people really sit down and negotiate according to a set of rules , unwritten but underpinned by a set of common beliefs. If no, why not?
Again it is back to the coordination issue .... what is the driver when a certain course of action is selected? More often than not, we use price as the basis to find the equilibrium between supply and demand. We may have taken the short-term view that the best result will come .... from everyone in the group doing what is best for himself . However, John Nash has added a caveat "and the group". According to him, " if we go for the best ( by definition scarce )... we block each other. Not a single one of us is gonna get it. So then we go for her friends, but they will all give us the cold shoulder because nobody likes to be second choice. Well, what if none goes for the best? We don't get in each other's way, and we don't insult the others. That's the only way we win. "
The following questions can help us understand better what is preventing us from feeling happy?

a)when you are NOT achieving what you set out to do, would you feel upset?

b)can you work around the setback and find an acceptable alternative?

c) why is it so important to achieve your goal?

Goal setting is process-driven and you need to understand what are the steps you require to take to reach from here to there. Too often, we make quick and unsubstantiated assumptions, and as a result we are not able to get to our goal. There is no short cut and when you analyse your mis-steps you will realise what are the stimuli that trigger the negative response.

Dealing with human emotion is one of the most challenging and difficult tasks. There are myriad of moving components at play and we cannot control the outcome as interests are not completely aligned. Again we can identify the stimuli that trigger the negative response.

So fundamentally, we need to identify like-minded people with shared values to begin with. So how can we convince people that cooperation is better than competition?

When it comes to co-operation, we need to think big but act in baby steps. This helps to breakdown complex issues into simpler elements. We need to underpin the efficacy of our assumptions and execute the steps in logical sequence. Every successful step reinforces trust and with trust it is possible to overcome the coordination issue. Once collaborators are comfortable and confident that cooperation can result in a win-win outcome, the end-to-end processes can then take on a life of its own with its own ecosystem of checks and balances - and we can sit back and enjoy the ride and have happiness as our companion.

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